Angelina Jolie Confirms Pregnancy

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Angelina Jolie officially announced her pregnancy on Saturday without actually officially announcing it by showing up to the Independent Spirit Awards in a skin-tight black dress showcasing a visibly pregnant belly. You know, using your clothes to make a statement can be a very effective way to communicate without using words. Like when you had a monster boner in the seventh grade and the teacher made you go to the board to diagram a sentence, for example. Your pants effectively communicated your love for nominative pronouns and objects of the preposition to the entire class. And then our snickering and pointing effectively communicated our delighted contempt for you. Sometimes words only serve to get in the way.

Angie and Brad at the Awards Saturday in Santa Monica:

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11 Comments, Comment or Ping

  1. BarbadoSlim

    I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, Yeeeah is the best grammar humor site on these here Internets and wattnots.

    Put that on your essay, and smoke it!

  2. RichPort

    I dunno… thin as she’s been, that might just be a sandwich bump.

  3. abby

    I smoked it this morning and got a wicked buzz. Thanks, Slim!

  4. nordo

    It’s called stating the obvious

  5. syd

    O/T, but did Brad get dressed in the dark. I know, he’s still yummy. But that jacket with those pants? That’s the best he could do?

    Then again, I’ll remind you that I’m from Mississippi. Not a fashion Mecca.

    BTW, Abby, I named our newest calf Britney Spears. She’s a wild little thing too. Suits her.

  6. sonya

    Brad looks like a 70’s Ken doll.

  7. open mouth jones

    My gramps wears those pants golfing.
    He bought them back in 1976, and through the miracle of technology- read RAYON and POLYESTER- they still look as good as they did that first day in Sears so many years ago.
    It disturbs me that my Gramps also has that suede jacket.
    Why on earth is BRAD FUCKING PITT wearing my Gramps’s clothes?
    Why GOD WHY!!! Now who am I going to think about when I’m under my boyfriend and he’s banging away, huh?
    DAMN YOU FICKLE FASHION GODS! DAMN YOU STRAIGHT TO HELL!!!!!!

  8. bionic bunny

    i was going to say larry from “three’s company”. does that help, jonesy? not really, huh?

    oh, god, why are they breeding AGAIN????

  9. open mouth jones

    Gee thanks bunny. you’re too kind ;)
    Now all I’ll be able to think of when I see brad is freaking larry from 3s company. Is he the one with his one ball hanging out of his short shorts in that one episode?
    Oh jesus, why did I go there?
    Now all I can think of is hairy balls. Fuck.

  10. Jesus

    Oh GOD! Next, AJ will dye her hair black, get a afro and a deep dark tan! These two are crazy! To Brad, stop trying to look like Robert Redford! “POOR SHILO!”

  11. Jesus

    BRAD IS WEARING A RUG!! OMG TOO FUCKIN FUNNY!

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